The Royal New Zealand Artillery

Recieved from Graeme Black

Time for a few funnies sent to me by others

For those who haven't heard, Washington State just passed two new laws - gay marriage and legalised marijuana. The fact that gay marriage and marijuana were legalised on the same day makes perfect biblical sense because Leviticus 20:13 says "If a man lies with another man they should be stoned." We just hadn't interpreted it correctly before!

In a dark and hazy room, peering into a crystal ball, the Mystic delivered grave news: "There's no easy way to tell you this, so I'll just be blunt. Prepare yourself to be a widow. Your husband will die a violent and horrible death this year."  Visibly shaken, Laura stared at the woman's lined face, then at the single flickering candle, then down at her hands. She took a few deep breaths to compose herself and to stop her mind racing. She simply had to know. She met the Fortune Teller's gaze, steadied her voice and asked, "Will I be acquitted?"

The Pope and Titiwhai Harawera are on the same stage at Waitangi in front of a huge crowd. The Pope leans towards Titiwhai and says, "Do you know that with one little wave of my hand I can make every person in this crowd go wild with joy? This joy will not be a momentary display, but will go deep into their hearts and they'll forever speak of this day and rejoice!"

Titiwhai replied, "I seriously doubt that! With one little wave of your hand?....Show me!"
So the Pope backhanded her and knocked her off the stage!
The crowd roared & cheered wildly and There Was Happiness Throughout The Land.